Garments for Each Other — Page 16
16 SEEKING A MATCH - AN EXAMPLE OF THE WRONG WAY TO SEEK A MATCH - PRAYER FOR GUIDANCE BY ALLAH ALMIGHTY ( Excerpt from Friday Sermon, December 1, 2006 ) A few days ago, someone wrote to me that he could not find a match for marriage due to non- cooperation from the Rishta Nata department ( Jama’at matrimonial service) of Pakistan. I asked for a report and found that several matches had been suggested but they were not accepted because the boy wanted a match according to his conditions. He himself was only educated up to 10 th grade; his own schooling was minimal but his conditions were that the girl must be educated, with a M aster’s degree; she should be earning, and her dowry should include a house and cash in amount of one to two million rupees. She should not only bear his expenses but also neither she nor her family should ask him to work. It should be his decision whether to work or not. Such a person can only be called insane. The Rishta Nata department should not pay any attention to such matches and such boys (I do not know why they kept suggesting matches to him), because if the Rishta Nata workers have to deal with such people, they might become insane themselves. Unfortunately for them they have to cooperate, but no one except a fool or a bully makes such demands. Sometimes no demands are made before the day of the wedding, but right after the wedding the behavior of the boy’s family changes completely. Sometimes complaints are received where unethical demands are made to the girl’s family. If the girl’s family does not respond to their satisfaction and the demands are not met, the girl faces taunts and disputes. May Allah give understanding to such people and have mercy on them.