Flowers for the Women Wearing Veils - Volume I — Page 186
! ! 186 Similarly, those who have complete freedom and are left un supervised are like sheep thrown before the wolves. If they are saved from bad morals or are reformed in some way , their parents will have played no part in th at. However, if they are destroyed and their moral values are corrupted , then their parents are responsible because they neglected their duty and did not watch over their children. Thus, one should adopt the middle path when reforming one’s children’s morals. There should neither be such severity that they cannot meet others, nor should there be so much leniency that they are free to do whatever they want, without any supervision. Usually , children do not learn good behavior from their parents , but from other children. However, it is the parent’s duty to keep an eye on what their children are learning. This should not be very difficult because whatever a child learns he will soon repeat it before others, and in this way , their shortcomi ngs are exposed. If parents wish to raise them well, they can easily do so, but many do not curb the ir children’s objectionable behavior out of love and affection. I f they do reprimand them once or twice, they do not remain consistent. There are also many who show hostility or needlessly defend their child ren if their children’s shortc omings are pointed out to them. So metimes , this dispute over the child leads to hostility between the adults. Therefore , the fore most point parents should keep in mind is to refrain from blindly loving their children. If someone complains to you about your child, you should deliberate on ways to reform them. If a child tells lies, steals, o r misbehaves in any other way, t he y should be discipline d, but not so harshly that t he y secretly continue to misbehave. Some parents respond so harshly that the child hide s his shortcomings from them and everyone else. Th e y fall into the habit of misbehaving behind their back , and it becomes impossible to reform such a child. Therefore , [parents] should remain vigilant that their child does not misbehave in secret , so they remain aware of their habits, and in this way , t he y can be easily reformed. How such vice s are borne and how they can be eliminated is a detailed topic , which I will leave alone at the moment. A t this time , I do wish t o s ay in regard s to reforming morals and deeds, children should neither be so