Domestic Issues and Their Solutions — Page 158
158 up , be it men or be it women, it is the tongue that goes on prolonging conflicts. A time comes when they make their minds up or are inclined to make their minds up that they do not want to be together. Likewise, you should shut your ears to those matters relating to close familial ( رحمی rehmi ) ties that are likely to create resentment. Sometimes if a person or a party says something wrong, the other also retorts back in kind. If one shuts one’s ears for a short time in order to stop an ongoing argument, many problems can subside ther e and then and apart from the problems of habitually quarrelsome men and women, generally conflicts do not come to pass. Therefore, shut your ears and you will come in peace. I often relate an account and it is a true account that a husband and wife were quarrelling while a little girl was watching them in astonishment. A short while later, they both realised the error of their way and in order to cover their embarrassment they asked the girl did her mother and father never argue or speak harshly with each other or did not get upset? The girl replied, ‘Yes, if my father is angry my mother stays quiet and if my mother is angry my father stays quiet and the disagreement does not go any further in our home. ’ This can lead to have a positive influence on childr en. Keep your eyes shut to each other’s shortcomings and keep your eyes open to each other’s good qualities. After all, each person, be it man or woman, has good qualities as well as shortcomings. I have seen that men are usually the